You probably wouldn't understand my thinking unless you were my best friend or grew up inside my head but since a certain age I expected to at some point be the mother of twins. It runs in my family and my brother and I are in the generation that usually produces twins, as far as the pattern seems to have run. Tyler also has twins on his side of the family. I recall old family photos and twin sets of piercing blue eyes. But he and I did not produce twins naturally. We sure came close! But no (extra) cigar, hahaha.
We've both been struggling and praying to find a more specific direction in this adoption (and thanks to those of you who have been praying with us!) and I have personally been scouring the internet and grilling experienced acquaintances to glean whatever information I can, hoping to find that "spark" that might point us in the right direction.
Well, you've probably guessed where I'm going with this. With growing certainty (and today a sudden spike in certainty) we have felt that we are meant to adopt twins. Now, ya'll might be doubtin', but we're serious about all of this. It's like when you are doing a puzzle and you just can't find what you need; nothing works, but then BAM, one particular piece slips into place and suddenly you can see things a little more clearly. You're by no means, finished, but for a while you have hope, and feel you can keep going, that you're headed in the right direction. We feel we are headed in the right direction.
Lately I feel like God is trying to nudge us. "You can do this. Don't give up. I have something more for you yet." All the times between these little successes feel like hanging from a cliff by our fingertips.
We are not yet there with the money for our paperwork, but on the flip-side neither has our house sold. We now have a cut off date, however. If our house does not sell by October we will be taking it off the market and from that point we will focus solely on the adoption(s). Once that is settled and our new little additions are all settled, and once all the follow up visits are complete we can put our home back on the market at that time. We really don't have the moola to do more than one home study!
So while we wait and see about the house and work to raise the funds, we will also be on the look out and be needing prayer for guidance toward the right situation - the right birth mom and babies. Our hope is that not only will these babies be right for our family, but that we will be the best situation/family for them. Whoever this momma is, we hope to be prepared to accept her little blessings into our home to raise as our own in a way that benefits them and glorifies God.
There are so many details yet to fall into place - finances, getting Reese potty trained, (yikes) purchasing a larger, more accommodating vehicle... but we have a strangely calm confidence that it will ALL happen one way or another.
....Now our other "baby" is punching my side of the bed, demanding to be played with. Such is life with a chihuahua/basenji mix. Please, whoever reads this, keep our family in your prayers!
And I wonder... perhaps this was why those onsies I found came in a two pack, HAHA! Just kidding... sort of. : )
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